Blue and green goo is good for you

Danny Cozzi

Imagine there was a food so nutritious, so vitalizing and so incredibly freaking old that it is responsible for producing much of the oxygen necessary to develop life on our wonderfully blue and green planet. What if I told you this organic superfood is a blue and green microalga which is basically the primordial ooze from which much of Earth’s life came?

Well, folks, it’s the truth. And according to an article from the Natural News Network, this nutritious powerhouse is packed to the brim with essential vitamins, minerals, proteins and all that good stuff we’re always told to eat.

“It has 60-70 [percent] complete protein, meaning it has all eight essential amino acids and 10 non-essential ones that support good health,” the article reads.

The percentages refer to how much of the alga is complete and usable protein for the body. Beef and chicken, according to another article from the Natural News Network, have between 20 and 25 percent complete protein. This is great news for vegans and vegetarians, like me, who are constantly pestered by nagging mothers about getting enough protein.

Well, take that, mom.

Granted, she was right about green vegetables. Maybe she should also have mentioned algae as I was growing up. If I had been fed blue and green sea-goo as a kid I might just be bench pressing school buses by now. Or at least a midsized sedan.

I don’t know about you folks, but if spirulina is as crazy awesome as the internet is telling me, I believe it’s time to start stuffing my face with this mushy, mucky goodness. After all, what if this is the secret to eternal life we’ve been looking for? I don’t know about you, but I’m gonna hit up immortality if I can.

However, research behind spirulina is a bit dicey. According to Medline Plus, the website for the National Institutes of Health, its health effects aren’t validated or confirmed, while another article from the Natural News Network claims humans can survive on it and water alone. But nevertheless, I am willing to side with it being a better health alternative than, say, Taco Bell’s “healthy” options.

Renae Mrowiec, junior family and consumer sciences major and nutrition minor, supports including spirulina as a healthy addition to one’s diet.

“It’s a good source of most of the essential vitamins, but it shouldn’t be taken as a replacement for any of them,” Mrowiec said. “It should be used to supplement an existing healthy diet, not to fully replace any of the proteins, amino acids or vitamins.”

So even if you don’t take the extreme route of stocking your fridge with this blue and green ocean-goo, you can rest assured that it couldn’t hurt to pick up a supplement or two. After all, it wouldn’t hurt anyone to push back a little health food, right? Or maybe I’m alone in my quest to find the potential Holy Grail of health foods. If I’m still around in 2113, I guess I’ll know what to thank.