Hopeless, unsure, powerless or depressed?

Why are so many families becoming victims of domestic violence?

Safe Passage, the domestic violence agency serving DeKalb County, will hold its eighth-annual vigil from 6:30 to 8:30 p.m. Monday at the DeKalb Area Women’s Center, 1021 State St.

The hosts of the event are the DeKalb Area Women’s Center and Safe Passage.

The vigil will be held to remember victims of domestic violence and to honor people in the community who contributed to the prevention of domestic violence.

“It is a way of bringing community awareness to the problem of domestic violence in our lives,” said Becky Parfitt, counseling coordinator for Safe Passage.

Parfitt said domestic violence is the same for young adults in high school and college as it is for adults.

Emotional abuse, like insults or intimidation, is a frequent form of violence.

“Physical hitting, kicking, slapping and shoving are also forms of domestic violence,” Parfitt said.

Safe Passage was incorporated in 1981 as a result of citizen concern that there was no safe place for victims of domestic violence, and has continued to expand programs and services to a significantly increased number of clients each year.

Many families are becoming victims of domestic violence for many reasons.

“The dynamics of domestic violence is the desire for one person to have power and control over others,” Parfitt said.

Safe Passage also has a temporary residential facility used to help people escape from violent homes, executive director Pamela Wiseman said.

The facility is also good for children.

“It is a safe place for people to be with their kids,” Wiseman said. “Seventy percent or more of the people in the nation’s prisons grew up in violent homes.”

She also said if people could end crime in homes, it could go a long way toward ending crime in the streets and the community.

Domestic Violence Awareness Month gives people the chance to better understand how it feels to be a victim and a chance to be involved with the agency and the community.

People within a community can help the agency by volunteering to answer phones for the domestic violence hotline.

Community members also can help by working with kids, donating things or by being present to say that domestic violence is not okay, Wiseman said.

“It gives us a chance to get involved with the community,” she said. “People can hear what we hear and understand the problem of domestic violence the way we understand it.”

Many victims of domestic violence are affected in many ways.

“Some feel hopeless, afraid and depressed,” Wiseman said. “Others drink or turn to drugs.”

Many domestic violence victims have very little confidence, and are afraid to leave abusive relationships.

Some people think they’ve done something wrong and try to behave better to stop the abuse, Wiseman said.

Although many victims may blame themselves, it’s not their fault.

“It’s about power and control, not about love,” Parfitt said.