Wild thoughts need release eventually

By Darrell Hassler

Where the Deep Red is bubbling inside me, at the very soul of my existence, there is only a single way out.

It is inside everybody. Waiting to explode into a beautiful, catastrophic animal scream of primitivity. This is a wildness where we bump against the walls and cry in pain and terror. But afterwards, we just laugh out loud and spin faster and faster until we fall down. Then we laugh louder and louder, with more hysterics, and everybody can hear us.

And we want it to be heard because it offers some sort of perfect power which is so easily seen in black and white. The violence of war, the sting of Muhammad Ali, naked shrills, brothers beating, mothers screaming at their children, dying from toxic wastes, hating the man on the other side of the line. It’s perfect. It’s animal.

Something about nakedness and challenging the world around you to look and stare is as if there is something incredibly wrong with a body. Yet all the times—ducks, alligators, chimpanzees—they walk naked all the time without notice. They fight. They scream. They don’t care.

So sometimes for everybody, there is a time to admire the crudeness of it all. Just hear the drumbeats of the world and dance wildly to a tune coming from your lungs and your nostrils. Do some push-ups. Cry afterwards. Hit a tree for effect.

Pure emotion makes everything very clear in the world. Science cannot even touch it. Religion cannot touch it. In fact, God has nothing to do with it. Pure emotion is a very individual thing. Only the individual can find it. It’s a matter of taking everything off.

The rules always put it down. Probably, it is best for all. But we cannot lose touch with the Deep Red middle we possess because then we forget there is more to us than a brain and a logic class. Our brains are only a small part. There are guts, slimy and red. This is real. The brain really cannot live without them.

So forget the rules, sometimes. Watch an ape on TV and realize that all along, while it fights in a jungle, that societal progress can often be a myth. Progress becomes regress, a regress from being a human being. No use feeling guilty, though, because we cannot help it. Like I said, we shouldn’t help it. But we need the Deep Red.

I don’t know if there is ever a way to experience the Deep Red perfectly. It would probably be too dangerous. High blood pressure and maybe a heart attack would be the result after a long period of it.

But others claim they have done it. Maybe under the inducement of a very strong drug, but others say they have experienced it.

So use violence and sex to make it all happen for you. Just once in your life, just so you can tell your wife and your children and your children’s children, how it was to feel the soul burst out through every organ of your body. They will understand, though they may never reach it themselves. Everybody must understand. They have to.

Don’t be confused or perturbed. There is no point in even refusing to believe in what you have because that would only be inner oppression—the type that only comes when you die.

There is no point in living dead all your life. Feel the Deep Red once, and you will carry it with you forever.