Ooh, is da mudslingin‘ gettin’ dirty.

It’s usually taken for granted that political commercials do more to smear the opponent of the person they’re for than to praise the candidate who pays for them. But this year, some of the commercials are getting down-right paradoxical.

For instance, take the race between Sue Suter and Dawn Clark Netsch. Both women are running for state comptroller. Neither have held the position before.

Suter’s commercials claim she is a fiscal responsibility watchdog and that Netsch is nothing more than a big taxer. The commercial says “Dawn Clark Netsch never met a tax proposal she didn’t like.”

The commercial goes on to say Netsch proposed several taxes and then thanks God only a few got through. Ah. A subtle way of saying Suter is opposed to lots of taxes without actually giving her committment. Clever.

But commercials for Netsch—many of which say little about her—claim that Suter was investigated for fiscal mismanagement. Is this the same Sue Suter who makes sure no one else handles money inaccurately?

Or consider this. George Ryan and Jerry Cosentino, both of whom are running for Secretary of State, are using some positive ads about themselves. Neither man has held the position before.

The problem is that the ads skew the issues. One of Cosentino’s is about how he supports stiff regulations for school bus drivers, including fingerprinted FBI checks and random drug testing.

At the end of the ad, Cosentino is seated on a jungle gym among a company of children. In true Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood fashion, the children chime, “Thank you, Mr. Cosentino.”

Ah. The kids are thanking Cosentino for finding them better bus drivers. It’s not like anyone in elementary school really gives two hoots about who pilots their buses, but it must’ve been fun to be on TV.

The even stranger ad belongs to Ryan. The spot begins with pictures of at least five mangled cars that apparently came together in a bad way because of alcohol. None are level.

In between the mess, in walks Ryan and some police. They find a Raggedy Ann doll. If he’s elected, Ryan will make tougher drinking and driving laws to make this kind of thing stop, the announcer says.

At the end, Ryan sits among heaps of happy children. Ah. Ryan will save more children’s lives by cracking down on DUIs and this made the children gleeful.

Really?

What’s upsetting about all this is it goes past simple mudslinging. It’s beginning to serve as a cloud on the real issues.

By watching Cosentino and Ryan ads, one might get the impression the men are all for children and nothing else. No matter how good that might be, Cosentino and Ryan aren’t about to drop their political careers and start working at children’s homes.

Anyway, kids don’t vote. But wait! Their parents do!

However, if these parents had any common sense, they’d be disgusted by the use of children to win political office.

Alas, no one sees that far. Everyone is blinded by the mighty TV box. And it’s just blowing smoke.