In my quest to find a decent band in Dekalb I journeyed far. From the reaches of the barren wasteland called the dorms I ventured to the hallowed land known as John St.

Here I found some of the more interesting bands roaming around campus. The first band I got a glimpse of was of the Lung Mustard species. This species was not timid in confronting me. Actually one of the clan approached me and I immediately retrieved the information I was seeking.

Chris Borresen, of the clan, informed me that Lung Mustard had metamorphosized from a defunct clan he wished not to mention. I asked about the rest of the clan and he told tales of Doug Mioducki, the bass player, and Christ Randall, the guitarist.

When asked the nature of his clan he replied,”Our ancestors come from two seperate tribes, the James Browns and the Black Sabbaths.” Chris seemed annoyed at my probing.

I asked him for a final remark, “If you catch it, get rid of it”. If you are looking for this species the best part of town to look would be at a John St. party.

I wandered down the street a bit and out from behind a tree jumped the high priest, Todd Rittmann, of the Newts cult. He startled me a bit but I quickly regained my composure. I had never come across this tribe in Dekalb so I demanded an explanation.

He told stories of a cavernous place some called Chicago. He explained that his ventures brought him west in search of an education. Hmmm.

I asked the background of his tribe. He told of a drummer, Kevin Wieth, who goes by “Big Bird”, and a bass player named Mark Bruno. He was friendly and even comical when he stated that his tribe was a mix of hard driving polka-funk and the New Kids on the Block. Obviously I was not getting straight answers from him.

He let me know that his cult was religious and the Newts had icons. These icons are Metallica and Jesus Christ. I was tired so I asked where one might find the Newts. He replied that they may be found in downtown clubs and sometimes in Dekalb at parties.

I was tired of being surprised by these various clans or tribes so I ventured to find one of the older bands in the area. I was on the search for the ever so elusive June Bug Massacre.

I knew where I could find them, in their lair. I stood at the door of their residence awaiting the wise man, Dan Whitaker. I was informed that most of the commune was on a journey of great importance, namely getting their schoolwork done.

I did talk to the fifth man, so to say, of the band. His given name was John Roche, and he had written a chant or two for the band. He seemed quite receptive and invited me in. I asked of the origin of his commune and he replied that theirs was ancient as far as local tribes went.

I was intrigued. What mystery lies behind the door of this old tradition? I asked if they had recorded and received a quick response. John said they would not record for at least two years.

Some time later an active member of the group arrived. I inquired about the mission of the group and “Ace,” the drummer, replied that they were on the never ending quest of chasing the sun. What kind of band was this with all this cryptic language?

I learned that they were followers of the Meat Puppets, a tribe from the west coast. June Bug Massacre is Mark Hoffman, guitar, Dan, guitar and vocals, Ace, drums, and Rob Moses, bass. JBM can be found either through intense meditation or at the Dekalb Coffeehouse.

I walked down the street a bit and came across a man jumping up and down yelling, “We are not hippies!” I was scared at first, he did look violent and ornery. I approached him. Trying to console him I asked what all this hippie business was about.

He went on about how everybody thought his band, Aquatic Noggin, was a bunch of hippies. He steamed at the ears with disgust.”We are powerfully diverse music, not hippies!” I agreed as any sane man would have done in my situation.

I had stumbled upon the find of the year, a new species of band. I asked his name and he replied, “Mike Waterman”. I have to admit the experience was unnerving. Mike then showed me a tape of theirs entitled “Think Rain”.

“Do you think we sound like hippies?,” he asked. “Well, of course not”, I replied. It wasn’t his state of mind that helped me with my answer, honest!

They are powerfully diverse as I heard in their tape. The other two members of this new band are Dan Chambers, guitar and vocals, and Paul Fini, bass. These two were more civil than Mike and a lot easier to talk to.

They told me about the exposure they recieved playing clubs like the Cabaret Metro, Club Stodola, the Limelight and Batteries Not Included,all in Chicago. They were serious with me and their music.

I was tired of looking for decent bands so I started to walk home. On my way I heard music from the cellar of a house, I investigated. I crept down the cellar steps as not to startle the unsuspecting band.

Instead of the band startling me I figured turnabout was fair play. I jumped into the room and was greeted by a cavalcade of stares. They asked the reason for this interruption and I told them that I was on an assignment to locate the debris of NIU’s fragmented music scene.

They were pleasant in telling me that they were King Archie. They also commented that they have been around for some time under the name of T.A.C..

They had an innocent quality about them. They informed me of their work.”We are all about bad relationships”,”Love and optimism can only exist as lies”, this is what were about.

Pretty forlorn but when I recieved a tape they had just recorded I was impressed. It was to the point.King Archie is John Porcellino, guitar and vocals, Laura Mars, bass, Steve Jacobek, guitar and Don Oglivie, drums. They can be tracked down at local parties and various clubs downtown.

The adventure ends here. I regret that I was not able to track all the local bands down, but that is more work for another day. Yes, music is alive and well in DeKalb.