If you are tired of hearing about oat bran, raise your hand.

Aha–I thought so! It seems every day a new oat bran product has popped up on the market, promising gullible consumers it “CUTS YOUR CHOLESTEROL INTAKE IN HALF!”

I personally have stayed away from the stuff. I haven’t jumped on the branwagon because of its popularity. I remain wary.

Face it, oat bran is not the most appetizing food in the world. Even the name sounds dull (Whereas “ice cream” and “Snickers” sound so good!).

I am also skeptical because I read somewhere if you have seven oat bran muffins a day–every day for THE REST OF YOUR LIFE–you will live an average of three days longer. For those three days, I think I’ll have an eclair and suffer in Fat Content Hell.

The prediction is not stopping the ex-cholesterol junkies, who write best sellers on bran diets and pile their carts with the entire first row of the cereal section.

If you haven’t been to the grocery store lately, check that out. The entire top shelf–approximately 20 feet–is totally devoted to some form of bran cereal. Shoppers can choose from flakes, rings, squares, chunks and oatmeal. For variety, fruit (but is it real?) is sometimes added.

Even Cheerios has capitalized on the fact that it has “always” been a great source of the big B. What’s next? Crunch Berries?

The grocery store is only one example. I ventured down to the good old vending machine the other day, in search of a circa-1982 danish or Cool Ranch Doritos. But there they were, item BB: oat bran cookies. Eeek!

I turned and ran blindly to the nearest convenience store, certain I’d find additives and preservatives there. Ha. While I was groping for a package of Twinkies, I spotted a new Hostess product.

Yes, Hostess now makes oat bran muffins. Those that brought us Ding Dongs with a shelf life of 12 years has succumbed to bran fever.

For those of you thinking, “Yes, but many people are advised to go on low cholesterol diets”, I agree with you. Bran certainly reduces the risk of heart attacks, but too many people use it as a cure-all and too many companies are taking advantage of those people. Oat bran only works when coupled with a healthy diet and excercise.

Case in point: I know people who swear by oat bran, then go into a frozen yogurt store and splurge. They order non-fat yogurt, but top it with hot fudge, gummy granola bears and M & M’s. No one touches the oat bran topping lying next to the sweet stuff.

It could be because it resembles taupe-colored chalk dust, but I think it goes deeper than that. People want to have their cake and eat it too, in this case “pig out on gooey fudge, candy and calories, then make up for it with oat bran.”

Until I am ordered by my doctor to cut down on cholesterol, I will not hop on the branwagon. I won’t gorge on high-fat foods, but I refuse to see oat bran as a “miracle food.” Ten years ago we had wheat germ; now it’s oat bran.

In the future, it could be something entirely new. But whatever the wonder food, one thing remains clear: common sense makes people healthier, not a single item.