Peppering Tuesday night’s lecture with anecdotes and brash Chicago humor, Dan Lena and Marie Howard-Lena used humor to deal with the emotional issue of understanding and coping with sexual assault.

“We have fun with what we’re doing, but we’re not going to make fun of any of these subjects,” Dan said to a responsive audience of about 100 people in Sandburg Auditorium.

During their presentation of “Hands Off … I’m Special,” the husband-and-wife team had the audience laughing at their antics one minute, and hushed the next as Marie recounted the abduction and violent rape she endured several years ago. She explained how her assault began a long struggle with low self-image, drug addiction and a suicide attempt.

“One day I said to myself, ‘I can’t live like this anymore.’ I can’t let this guy control me any more. He controlled me for four hours, but I can’t let it go on anymore, and I’ve got to do something to change my life,” Marie said, describing her decision to learn martial arts.

The Lenas focused on instilling self-esteem in students, enabling them to defend themselves from potential assaults and cope with situations where they have no other alternative except submission. “Rape is a crime of humiliation,” she said.

People—women in particular—are constantly bombarded with negative messages, the couple explained. “We are not saying all men are rapists and all men are jerks,” she said. “But it’s the jerks in a woman’s life who ruin it for all the other guys,” added Dan. “You are nature’s greatest gift and you are special. We honestly believe that,” he said.

Both husband and wife are trained karate experts and they demonstrated several techniques for self-defense. Marie cautioned, however, “every situation is different. Sometimes self-defense is impossible.” She advised, “If your life is in clear danger, submit.”

Dan and Marie demonstrated three techniques to deter attackers approaching a victim from the front. They included thrusting a knee into the attacker’s groin, ripping the attacker’s face with fingernails and snapping a hand into the attacker’s eyes.

In the 4 percent of cases where the attacker has a weapon, they suggested trying to get the attacker to lower the weapon. Dan suggested running as a last resort. “A moving target is hardest to hit,” he said.

The Lenas said tactics such as lying to the attacker or doing something vulgar to dissuade him were “ridiculous” and unlikely to work, unless the victim needs to bide time until she can react safely. Dan stressed never to let an attacker take you somewhere else in an attempt to stall for time.

Many audience members surrounded the couple after the lecture, asking questions and exchanging comments. Two future residence hall assistants said although they were required to attend the program, they enjoyed it and would definitely attend again.

The Lenas lectured last year at NIU and hopefully will continue to appear regularly on campus, said Grant Towers Area Coordinator James Brunson. Programs ideally are held in the beginning of the semester to inform incoming students, he added. The lecture was organized by Grant Towers North and funded by the Campus Activities Board, the Residence Hall Association and NIU Student Housing Services.

The couple also presents lectures on alcohol and substance abuse to grade schools and high schools. The Lenas rarely are asked to talk about sexual assault with young children, Dan said. Only after an incident has occurred are they asked to help.

Unfortunately, “things are still not being done the right way,” he said. Children need to know about assault before it actually happens, he said.

The Lenas present their lectures nationwide, as well as teach self-defense seminars at about 40 Illinois high schools. The Lenas recently made the Windy City Health Club in Chicago their headquarters, where they operate their seminar business and concentrate on bodybuilding.

The Lenas are organizing their own bodybuilding competition, in addition to their own weight training careers. They are enthusiastic about being featured and interviewed in the June issue of Muscle Mag International, Dan said.