Drugs.

Yes, peoples the government is cracking down on drugs. It’s election time and the public is pissed about drug use, so the clowns in Washington are trying to do something.

Yep, the big boys got a plan. But the bill they’re working on looks to be about as effective as the withdrawal method of birth control. “Well, I thought it would work.”

These guys are so blind to reality it makes me sick.

First, there’s the highly publicized possible death penalty for someone who commits murder in a drug-related felony. Yea, that’s really gonna terrify someone who walks around with a machine gun ready to blow away anybody that pisses him off.

And what if the drug dealer can read the papers? We got one ass-kickin‘ record on carrying out the death penalty—101 people executed since 1977. Most of the major drug-lords are probably responsible for that many deaths themselves.

Next, we got this deal where evidence discovered without a search warrant could be used in court. But the cop had to have been acting in the “good faith belief” and without violating the fourth amendment (unreasonable search and seizure).

That sounds fair. Some redneck cop sees a guy with long hair and a tie-dye, “Looks like a doper to me Charlie, let’s bust some heads.” “Good faith?” Yea, interpreted by some redneck judge that hates all long haired “hippie freaks” anyway. Peace, justice and the communist way.

OK, how about if we impose a fine of up to $10,000 for casual users who get busted with small amounts of a drug? Ferocious, dude! I know I’m petrified. How many casual users actually get caught? Most of them use drugs in their homes where the cops can’t come in without a warrant. Oops, forgot about that “good faith” deal. Maybe they will be able to bust into your house—that is if they got nothing better to do.

This is my favorite part. If you get nabbed twice, they will take away your student loans, public housing, federal contracts and some federal licenses. That is pretty tough. They mighta got one right here.

But what about things like welfare and Medicaid? Nope, you’ll still be able to get those. “We’ll take away your house, but we’ll still give you the money to buy drugs.” This is the kind of crap that they think is going to stop people from using drugs?

Oh, they’re getting tough. But there is still some compassion in their hearts. If you do get caught twice, you can go into drug rehab. After you get done listening to all those nasty stories about other addicts and how their lives are so much better, now you can get all of your federal benifits back.

YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING!

“Like, wow man. All I gotta do is listen to some dude rap at me for a while and act like I give a shit and then I can get my house, loan, whatever back? I love this country!”

It’s obvious to me that the fellas on the hill really put a lot of thought into this one so far. They probably talked to hundreds of concerned citizens about what they can do to stop the drug problem. Yep, hundreds of concerned citizens who wouldn’t know a joint if it was in their liquor cabinet.

It appears that people think we have to slow down the demand if we want to end the drug problem in America. Well, maybe if they would have talked to a few people that use drugs or have used drugs in the past they would have come up with some laws that might actually put a stop to the problem.

People know they’re not gonna get caught, so what do they care? No, you don’t curb demand by imposing stricter penalties on users who will probably never get caught. You curb demand by making the drugs so scarce that most people can’t afford them and those that can, can’t find them.

How? Bust the importers. We have thousands of people in the military training for a war. Well, here’s a war. Get those people out there to waste smugglers instead of our money. Nah, forget that. It might work.