If you had a choice between this column, a stuffed pizza, or sex, what would you pick?

As much as my ego would love to believe my columns rate way up there with what’s said to be one of the top three pleasures of human existence, most of you probably would choose the latter. But that’s okay, because most of you are adults, responsible of making such important decisions.

You might have kept reading this because the word “sex” is captivating and always manages to gain attention. And that’s okay, too, because you all are old enough to be captivated and fascinated by that word. But some startling news I read last weekend revealed that kids who are just old enough to learn how to spell that word are having that word.

Part of a large-scale study which surveyed groups of sexually active middle school children found the average age at which they first had “that word” was 11 years old—just about the same age some kids start getting the hang of the alphabet.

That’s a very scary statistic when you consider more than just the possibility of these children getting pregnant. For a long time, this was the only public worry related to premarital sex. And although attention to unwed moms might have subsided, the problem still exists.

But now things are a bit more complex. Teen (or child) pregnancies seem miniscule compared to the growing amount of complications that come in the form of physically disabling or often fatal Sexually Transmitted Diseases. The list of risks is longer than a line at the bursar’s office.

The diseases that can come along with all this “uneducated” sex are considered major physical threats to society. But this threat has not been successful in scaring children out of doing it. A pretty frustrating situation to say the least.

So what can be done? Should there be a law against uneducated sex? That most certainly is not feasible for obvious reasons. Should we arm little girls with chastity belts starting in the fourth grade? I don’t think moms would go for that one. How about targeting the parents? We already tried that. What about giving up? No way.

There is something that can be done. Before parent education and aggressive elementary and secondary school campaigns can be successful, some big-time work needs to be done to change an age-old prevailing attitude.

The ancient tactic of condemning and trying to stop premarital, or uneducated, sex has to be wiped out. Parents and teachers need to face the fact that it’s going to happen no matter what they say or do. Hormones are pretty stubborn things. A parent who is away at work in the day cannot prevent what is going on in their child’s bedroom, just the same as a teacher has no control over what their students do after school hours.

After adults learn to stop saying “don’t do it,” they have to get used to saying “I don’t approve of it, but if you are going to do it ….” If you are going to do it, be aware of what might happen. Be aware that you could get pregnant, or contract some terrible disease. Be aware that there are ways to prevent such things from occurring.

Most importantly, be aware that it is happening. Do not try to deny it. No child is immune to it, no matter how religiously he was brought up. Statistics prove it.

In other words, don’t fight a fact—deal with it. When students, teachers or parents see ads in this newspaper placed by Health Enhancement Services warning to “Know Your Partner” or “Sex is Never an Emergency … Minimize the Risks,” they ought not to be offended. The service is doing what every institution should try to do, realize a disturbing fact, accept that it can’t be changed, and do what it can to prevent its side effects.

Of course it’s hard to teach millions of old dogs new tricks. But this particular trick could just do the trick—and save lives.

Debra Fleischman