Spring Break: How to catch, release your spring fling

By Rachel Scaman

For those of you leaving DeKalb this weekend, Spring Break means finding someone who can be your love bug for the week.

If this isn’t your first Spring Break, you’re already a pro; however, if you’ve never been on the Spring Break journey, you’ll need some help. Here are some ways to have a successful spring fling without any baggage at the weekend.

1. Don’t tell them your real name. I’ve always found mystery gives you a little something extra. You get to be whoever you want.

If I were you, I would come up with a name they won’t soon forget. Give them a name they will tell their grandchildren about one day: “I remember that spring break with Constantine Smith. He sure knew how to ruffle my feathers,” or “That Chastity Jones … she wasn’t as pure as her name would suggest, kids.”

If you’re lucky, you can avoid introductions completely and just get to the good stuff. You’ll never see this person after you leave paradise, so what does it matter?

2. Have a special place where you and your spring fling go to get away from it all. Take him or her all the way to the end of the beach where all the seaweed gets washed up on the shore. So romantic. Plus, if your spring fling isn’t exactly a looker, you can hide him or her from your friends and the rest of the beautiful people.

3. Don’t go tanning before you go and don’t put on sunscreen while you’re there. This could work in your favor one of two ways: You can either use severe sunburn as an excuse to blow off your spring flings if they start turning into stage five clingers or you can use it as an excuse for them to rub sun block all over your body.

This is just a suggestion; I’m sure you can find tons of ways to persuade them to rub lotion all over you.

4. Flirt with them at the bar then tell the bartender to put it on their tab. It’s Spring Break; no one is going to remember how many drinks they bought at the bar. Frankly, if they’re good looking you can give them a tip at the end of the night for all the drinks they bought you. It’s even better if you’re good looking because then you don’t have to give them anything. You and your beauty earned it. Spring Break is the season of giving, isn’t it?

5. If you see someone from the Northern Star while you’re on your trip, make them your spring fling. You’ll have the best time of your life. You might even fall in love — mostly because we will do anything you ask. We don’t get out often.

We are lucky we caught someone’s eye in the first place. Be careful, though: If you fall in love with us, we won’t be easy to forget — or get rid of … .