If you want to try some actual Italian food, consider the delicious squid ink pasta with breadcrumbs, anchovies, and sautéed scallops.

Here’s what you need:

– 1/3 cup olive oil

– 12 anchovies (about one tin)

– 6 garlic cloves

– Red pepper flakes

– 1 cup panko bread crumbs

– 1 pound squid ink pasta, linguine or spaghetti

– Truffle salt

– 3 egg yolks

– 10 scallops

– 1 tablespoon lemon zest

– 1 squeeze (I know it’s not an official measurement, but you know what I mean) of lemon juice

Here’s how you do it:

Mince the garlic and anchovies. You don’t have to actually mince the anchovies, just slice them up as best you can. They’re squishy. Fill a large pot with water and bring it to a boil, then add a little salt. Add the pasta, stir, and cook for as long as the fancy little package tells you to, while carefully reminding yourself it’s fine to take orders from a recycled plastic bag. Make sure to save some of the pasta water before you drain it (about a half cup).

While that’s cooking, heat up the olive oil in a pan over medium-high heat until it starts shimmering. Add the anchovies, garlic and a couple shakes of red pepper. Then cook that for a minute. Add the bread crumbs, stir them around a bit, and let them cook for two to three minutes until golden brown. Make sure to stir occasionally while they’re cooking so they don’t burn since bread tends to do that. Once the bread crumbs are done cooking, set them aside in a bowl for later. Mix the egg yolks and three tablespoons of the pasta water in a large bowl. Your pasta should be done by now, so add that in and stir around the pasta until it’s nice and coated in the eggy stuff. The pasta will cook the egg yolk since it should just be done cooking, so don’t start freaking out that your precious kids will get salmonella. Your little ones will survive to screw up “Ode to Joy” in next week’s piano recital.

Stir in the bread crumbs, salt, pepper and a bit of truffle salt.

Add a tablespoon each of olive oil and butter to the pan, and heat it over medium-high until the butter is melted.

Put the lemon zest and scallops in the pan, and turn the scallops once they turn brown for about two minutes a side.

Once the scallops are done, give them a squeeze of lemon juice and add them into the pasta bowl.

Stir once more, put it on a plate and shove it in your mouth. You can also do that twirly thing with the fork, I don’t care.

I do care what you put into your ears, though. Check out this week’s track from Black Sabbath. It’s “Warning:”