In honor of Sexual Assault Prevention Month: Let’s talk about sex, baby.

According to oneinfourusa.org, one in four college women will be, or have been, victims of sexual violence.

In my experience, rape and/or sexual assault has been the leading commonality between myself and other women I’ve met. It’s disturbing that despite knowing nothing else about each other, many women and girls can bond this way.

Far too many conversations have sparked between myself and others from the mention of past rapists, to detailing the crime (if they were conscious) of how their lives will never be the same.

From birth, we’re taught to hide our most intimate body parts under miniskirts and tank tops, a cruel juxtaposition between self-preservation and looking cute.

As we grow older and our bodies mature, the trend continues but with an added element of hyper sexualized media images as well as mounting pressures to negotiate between the desire to have sex and an ever-thinning set of circumstances of when we can safely do that.

Without undercutting the serious degree in which rape and sexual assault touches the lives of men and boys, women and girls are victims of these crimes to an acutely disproportionate amount, generally at the hands of men.

Women and girls are habitually taught not to go out past a certain time of the night, and if they do, not to go alone, as if we have some sort of inborn curfew. We’re publicly ostracized for wearing almost anything and are told to “make the best of a bad situation,” that, naturally, we are told we asked for.

I don’t know about you, but none of my short-shorts or bikini tops say, “Rape me, please,” at the top.

Regardless of the extensive set of rules young girls and women must abide by in an effort to avoid sexual violence, victims of sexual abuse are not ever to blame.

Rather than teaching children, especially boys, at a young age to respect women, we teach young girls not to get caught at the wrong place at the wrong time. Essentially, we’re preaching, “Don’t get raped” rather than simply, “Don’t rape.”

It’s imperative for boys and men to be vocal on this issue and to take a stand against this sort of violence. Not only does this give all men a bad reputation as sex monsters unable to control any urge, but silence and failure to take responsibility equates to complicity and apathy.

Men whose hands are free of inflicting sexual violence upon someone are just as valuable as those who have not when taking a stand against perpetuating it any further.

These women are our mothers, sisters, daughters, girlfriends, best friends and partners, and the traumatic violence many of them have lived through are to no fault of their own, but rather grow from a culture with such disdain for women, only 3 percent of rapists ever face a day in jail, according to the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network.

The new message is clear: Don’t rape. Spread the word.