Anyone who has attended a concert is familiar with the very specific way that some teen to twenty-something women act.

They dress provocatively, drink heavily and flirt shamelessly with lead singers, guitarists, bassists and drummers. These scantily-clad fan girls will follow musicians, practically salivating, and jump at the opportunity to gain entrance the tour van.

While, thankfully, exceptions to this general behavior exist, this stereotype is not too far off from the behavior seen at many concerts. Women who will sacrifice their dignity for a musician’s signature in places that no Sharpie should touch, and who will drink as much as possible to work up the courage to do it.

While it may be all in good fun for most women, and admittedly, many women are content with a hug or a chest autographed by a lead singer, there are those extreme cases in which women take it a step further and try to win the favor of their favorite band in other ways which can lead to serious regrets and serious consequences.

And for what? For some guy in some band to remember you as just another piece of road beef? Ladies, please. Women are smarter, classier and more aware than this.

The thrill of meeting a member of your favorite band is absolutely real. Getting to shake the hand that wrote your favorite song is incredible. These are the people we look up to. They create music that speaks to and validates experience, and for that, we have nothing but respect for them. As women, we need to remember that, while we may love the artist because of the music they give us, there are other ways to let our favorite bands know that we appreciate them than giving them something to look at. We shouldn’t dumb ourselves down and doll ourselves up just for the attention of some notorious musician.

There’s absolutely no reason that the gorgeous lead singer of your favorite band shouldn’t give you the same respect that you give him. If you’re one of those people that likes to meet the band, consider next time having the confidence to speak to them without hiding behind the comfort of sloppy drunkenness and indiscrete sexuality. Instead, just be the version of yourself that your parents, friends and significant others love and respect. Joke around with the guitarist, shake hands with the bassist, tell the lead singer how much his words inspire you. If that band is truly as great as they lead their fans to believe, that will mean much more to them than anything you could show them in the backseat of a van. And if not, they don’t deserve your support.