Gayle Dubowski did so much for me and for everyone who knew her, simply by being.

I’m sure if I talked to everyone that knew Gayle, something new about her character would come out. But what struck a chord with me was just how she stood out, and even though she was shy, she unashamedly lived her life with a childlike heart.

Gayle loved the simple. She loved the rain, sometimes stomping in puddles. She loved to make jack-o-lanterns, especially scooping the goop out of pumpkins. She even found fun in mundane, everyday chores. On one occasion, Gayle offered to help one of our friends, Stephanie, fold laundry.

When they got back to Stephanie’s apartment, Gayle got excited just to see so many socks that she gleefully threw them in the air.

“I was kind of like, ‘who is this girl that I brought back to my apartment?'” Stephanie said. “She would get excited about things that most people hate. She loved doing dishes and I never understood why.”

Another aspect I admired about Gayle was just how much she cared for the people in her life.

The church we’re a part of devotes time every Sunday to people who wish to make prayer requests. Anyone can write anything they wish to be prayed about on a card, and one night out of the week some members of the church would get together and pray about the requests on the cards.

Those who take part in the prayers can also offer up their own prayers and requests during the session. Gayle went to these prayer request sessions, and one night she began to pray about one of her friends because she wasn’t a Christian.

“I just love her so much,” Gayle said, pushing through tears, her words peppered with anguish. She felt so strongly about this because she had strong convictions about her faith.

“She desired to do what was right, and it seemed to not be for her own benefit, but just simply because it was what was right,” said Anthony Testa, the minister of our church.

My fondest memory of Gayle happened to be the time she taught me a lesson. One spring afternoon, I was walking her to the Founders Memorial Library after working on a project with her and our friend Nia.

We had missed the bus in Eco Park, and I began to grumble about that and about how heavy my oversized laptop was on my shoulders. After I kept complaining about our situation, Gayle offered to carry my laptop, and in exchange I would carry her bag.

“Oh please Gayle, you won’t make it to the end of the block,” I said, thinking about my 230-pound frame in comparison to her small and dainty stature. But she insisted and said she would carry it for a while and return it. After walking several blocks on Annie Glidden, I offered to take it back, but she refused.

I knew she was struggling, and I eventually asked for it back as I thought about how many people saw me carrying her little girlie bag. But she refused, adjusted the strap and didn’t offer one word of protest. She finally gave me back my laptop in front of the library.

The more I think about it, the more I think she was laughing at me on the inside. But, that’s how she was with everything. I honestly don’t remember her complaining about anything — she enjoyed life fully, and she showed it.

I miss Gayle, but I’m comforted by her life and her spirit.