Like any child of the ’90s, I watched a lot of Nickelodeon. Linda Ellerbee was like a mother to me, while Mike O’Malley was like a father and Marc Summers was the crazy, obsessive-compulsive uncle. Together, we were family, and together, we matured. Eventually, by the time I grew up and grew out of my footie pajamas, so had Nick. Perhaps it was time to move on. Yet, I’m a bit reluctant.

The classics are already showing their age. “GUTS” is a particularly dated precursor to another popular, canceled game show, “Dog Eat Dog.” Would anything beyond the opening credits and introductions survive in today’s politically correct society? Spare me the Agro Crag — far too pointy. Even “Figure It Out,” which didn’t premiere until the latter half of the decade, screams retro. So what about this channel is so unmistakably important that I can’t get it out of my head?

Kenan is still as doughy as he is loud and obnoxious. He’s on “SNL” now. Amanda Bynes is a movie star. Melissa Joan Hart traded her open window for the witch’s brew. And that chick who played Alex Mack is doing her thing for just about anybody who will listen. They’ve found their outs and successfully extended themselves beyond their roles as teen actors in programs from way back when.

I’m not alone on this, of that I know. There are groups all over the Internet for people like us, Web sites dedicated to individuals with nostalgia complexes and problems letting go of those who provided years of programming in which the end result was a neon green slime bath. It didn’t matter the cause, because the gooey stuff was always on tap.

I choose not to join the Facebook group titled, “I WANT MY 90’s NICKELODEON BACK,” on principle. To be one of the 300,000-plus members would be far too much for me and would stir up too many memories.

Instead, I engage my obsession, embrace the stranglehold my past has on my life and flip through the eight different Nick stations DIRECTV offers me, all in search of my real parents and maybe, just maybe, that crazy uncle of mine.