The other night, I couldn’t sleep, so I started flipping through the endless garbage that is late night TV. During my surf, I happened to stumble upon an episode of “The Pick Up Artist 2” on VH1. What I discovered made me cringe.

Mystery, a 21-year-old virgin turned magician turned master pick-up artist, teaches innocent, shy guys to become those creepy jerks that prowl night clubs to get women into bed with them.

Though he may be teaching these guys to be more outgoing and comfortable around women, Mystery is teaching these guys (and those watching) that it’s better to be a jerk than a gentleman.

The pick-up lines that these struggling guys are throwing out are so ridiculous that they usually have the opposite effect. Weak lines such as “My friends and I just completed a caper like in ‘Ocean’s 11,'”; “Would you ever date a guy in a wheelchair?” and “‘Nobody puts baby in the corner:’ what movie is that from?” are constantly used to no avail.

Not only are these lines ridiculous, offensive and just awkward, but where are the guys supposed to go from there? A pick-up line should merely start an easy-flowing conversation, not put the guy into an awkward situation that makes him look even more like a loser.

Mystery teaches these guys to “open a set” (engage in conversation) using his “Mystery Method.” His regimen includes a multitude of his made-up jargon like “IOI” (indicator of interest) and “DHV” (demonstration of higher value). These ridiculous terms are difficult to keep track of during the show, and without knowing all of Mystery’s terms, I thought he was telling a contestant to make his move because the girl was showing some sort of venereal disease.

Who is this Mystery guy, anyway? While he boasts that he is some sort of womanizing genius, who would actually fall for any of his tricks? I mean, I can’t think of a single self-respecting woman who would go after a guy wearing goggles, a large furry hat, leather pants, boots and a mesh shirt. He wears sweater dresses! I would love to get that guy on “What Not To Wear;” it would be Stacy and Clinton’s day.

Women don’t need any more jerks prowling for nothing more than a one-night stand. What women really want is a stand-up gentleman who will open a door and show us some respect instead of a cross-dressing, washed-up magician spouting out corny pick-up lines.

If you ask me, this pick-up artist needs to pack up his act and go back to magic where his outfit is more acceptable.