Rating: 5/10

Starring: Rainn Wilson, Christina Applegate, Teddy Geiger

“The Rocker,” which opened this past Wednesday, didn’t exactly rock, but it sure sank like one, as the film didn’t even make the top 10 list at the box office.

Moviegoers don’t seem to be swayed by Rainn Wilson’s desperate attempts to get more people to see his film. Wilson reached out to his loyal “Office” fans by creating a viral video ransom note stating, “I have kidnapped your beloved Jenna Fischer, and she will remain in my prop Firebird until my demands are met.”

Since the demands happen to be that his movie must make $18.7 million by Sunday at midnight, things are looking rather bleak for Fischer, with the film only grossing $3.8 million since it’s opening.

So where exactly did this film go wrong? With funny-man Wilson as Robert “Fish” Fishman, a failed ’80s drummer getting a second chance at fame with the help of a moody heartthrob, played by pop singer Teddy Geiger and “Superbad’s” Emma Stone, it sounds promising.

However, moviegoers might remember when this premise was brought to life five years ago with Jack Black in “School of Rock,” and rightly so.

“The Rocker” presents itself almost like a bad sequel of “School of Rock,” picking up where the last one left off, but with noticable changes. The rockin’ kids were replaced with high schoolers, without the adorable charm and surprising talent.

Black’s music lessons were replaced with Wilson’s “partying lessons” as he channels Will Ferrell’s type of comedy using vomit, excessive sweating and his overweight, middle-aged, naked body for laughs.

Though these scenes may elicit a few laughs, it is really the supporting cast that drag this “rock” along. Will Arnett, Fred Armisen and Bradley Cooper add plenty of comedic relief as ’80s hair metal band Vesuvious.

Their fake British accents, glittering skin-tight outfits and “guy-liner” make for quite the spectacle. However, one of the best scenes is a brief cameo from comedian Dimitri Martin as an artsy music video director. His hilariously uptight and demanding character is almost enough to get viewers through the rest of the film.

As “The Rocker” came to a close, the movie was full of heart-warming lessons and encouragement for “rockers” of all ages to follow their dreams.

This is a positive message for young teenagers, but mostly bores the rest of us. Wilson shouldn’t quit his day job as witty nerd Dwight on “The Office,” because this is where he truly shines. We’ll leave the rockin’ to Black and wait for the real sequel of “School of Rock” as rumors of its production have already been announced.