‘Gilmore Girls’ is no fix for senoritis

By NYSSA BULKES

I’m thrilled for summer.

The sun’s neat and everything, but there’s nothing quite like poking your eyes out, waiting for the end of a tough semester.

In high school, senioritis comes three-and-a-half years into your four-year term. In college, it comes every 18 weeks. There’s no escaping it; it’s merely a fact of life in place just to spite us.

My third-year senioritis, however, has brought me a new perspective. Hours, minutes, step aside!

I now measure my units of time in episodes of “Gilmore Girls.” Yes, I’ve gone the way of Hugh Grant in “About a Boy” with my kooky time-telling format, but it’s great. Here’s my train of thought:

One episode of “Gilmore Girls” = about 45 minutes = slightly less than a Monday-Wednesday-Friday class.

It’s the end of a semester, so going to class has gained importance. Logan is tasty, though, and Luke and Lorelai’s future is equally important. TV-induced heart pitter-patter definitely wins in the appeal department. Sorry, lecture, let’s reschedule.

Four episodes of “Gilmore Girls” = about three hours = a night class.

Wow, this one is so tough, I’m going to use a coin. Seeing the reconciliation of Richard and Emily in season five or being lectured on the idiosyncrasies of realism in German literature.

Heads: “Gilmore Girls.” Tails: “Gilmore Girls.” I wonder which way this one will go.

One season of “Gilmore Girls” = about 16 hours = the time I should be using to study for two of my three-credit classes.

Either I can better understand the economic media management theories and how clouds are formed, or I can watch Rory break-up Dean’s marriage. That is a turning point in the characters’ lives. See, I just don’t remember how the two manage to finagle their tryst as not to get caught by the Star’s Hollow gossip brigade.

I think watching “Gilmore Girls” is justified; I’ll just be studying another form of management.