Fraternity members were educated on how to treat a lady Wednesday night in Cole Hall at a presentation concentrated on sexual assault sponsored by NIU’s Men Against Sexual and Interpersonal Violence.

Troy Melendez, psychologist and coordinator of MASIV, lead the hour-long discussion to a group of about 200 fraternity members.

Even in college years, people are inadequately informed on the topic, Melendez said.

Melendez told the group of men he could not have an honest discussion in a mixed gender audience. Presenting the issues is easier when men are presenting to men and talking about the issues.

Shortly after this statement, the mention of penises caused snickers among the crowd.

“Can I say penis?” Melendez asked. “That’s not a fifth-grade word everyone is going to laugh at is it? We all have them.”

To instill empathy effectively in the men, a video was shown of a lieutenant lecturing police officers on sexual abuse. Instead of describing a female victim, the lieutenant described a police officer forced by gunpoint to perform sexual acts on two men.

Melendez used the example to show how a female feels when she is raped. A woman feels embarrassed and hurt if the validity of the attack is questioned by peers, Melendez said.

One in four women have survived rape or attempted rape since her 14th birthday, Melendez said. He asked the men to raise their hand when asked if they had a sister, girlfriend or mother.

Most victims will turn to a male after an attack. He expressed the importance to listen and be supportive of their friend.

A man being able to recognize when he has gone too far is key to avoiding sexual assault, Melendez said. He conveys this by comparing video games to sex.

“You don’t know what it’s like to be left halfway through the game,” Melendez said. “No guys, it doesn’t happen like that.”

Steven Jenkins, president of Pi Kappa Phi, said the presentation opened his eyes to the issue.

“I’ve learned a whole new perspective on sexual assault and how it’s joked about and really should never be joked about,” Jenkins said.

Interfraternity Council President Patrick Reichel said he plans to spread light throughout the semester on neglected subjects, including sexual assault.

“Sexual assault is something that is thought of as a woman’s issue caused by men,” Reichel said. “Some even think of it as a woman’s issue caused by fraternity men. We want to send a message that we want to be equal partners on this topic.”