Shaking off a New Year’s hangover, I peered deep into my crystal ball and encountered the following future headlines for 2006. While I’d like to see many of these come to fruition, my crystal ball has been known to be as effective as trying to run a thermodynamics algorithm on an Apple II. Therefore, for pure entertainment purposes only, the following headlines have been handicapped and deconstructed to determine legitimacy.

‘Strike a pose: Wolfe captures Heisman’ – Dec. 9, 2006

Story: The nation’s leading rusher electrifies the college football world.

X-Factors: With hot-shot underclassmen Reggie Bush, LenDale White, Brian Calhoun and Vince Young forgoing their final year of eligibility, start the drum beat NOW for Wolfe. Brady Quinn, Troy Smith and Drew Tate will offer tough competition. If Wolfe stays healthy, he’s a lock for a trip to the Big Apple. The only thing that keeps Wolfe from being the odds on favorite is the lack of exposure for the MAC.

Odds: 7 to 1

‘NIU women’s soccer on the rise’ – Oct. 29, 2006

Story: Young Huskies enter MAC tournament in head coach Marci Miller’s second year.

X-Factors: The senior leadership of Elaine Eliadis combined with a young nucleus of Jenna Clausen, Thea Johnson and Karen Enockson can propel NIU to the next level. Hard-working head coach Miller and assistant Paul Jobson give NIU an edge on the sideline.

Odds: 5 to 1

‘NIU dances into the field of 64’ – Mar. 12, 2006

Story: An 81-76 win over Ohio gives the Huskies a MAC title and automatic berth in the NCAA tourney.

X-Factors: An equal opportunity offense devoid of a superstar play-maker is a double-edged sword. Sharp in preventing reliance one scorer, dull when a go-to-guy is needed down the stretch of games. The MAC beasts are in the East. Four teams have double digit wins, and flawless league records, led by 8-5 Miami, and their 5-0 MAC record. NIU competes with the weak sisters in the MAC West, where Toledo is the only team over .500.

Odds: 12-1

‘South Side Repeat’ – Oct. 27, 2006

Story: White Sox capture second-straight World Series title with sweep of Mets.

X-Factors: GM Kenny Williams didn’t let the Sox engine idle this winter, improving a team that rolled through the regular and postseasons. Can pitching, defense and a lineup loaded with more pop invoke memories of the last Reinsdorf team to enter the stratosphere of being a dynasty? The last five champs have been one-and-done.

Odds: 7 to 1

‘Buck-shot: NIU downs Ohio State 34-31’ – Sept. 3, 2006

Story: Wolfe goes wild with 240 yards, 2 TD; Dan Nicholson throws for 2 scores.

X-Factors: NIU has the deck stacked against it. The Horseshoe, junior quarterback Troy Smith and a potent BCS tested offense await. NIU tuned up playing David against Golieths Michigan and Northwestern, and just might have the moxie to slay OSU.

Odds: 10-1

‘BCS bound!’ – Dec. 3, 2006

Story: An undefeated season and MAC title earn NIU a trip to the Orange Bowl.

X-Factors: If NIU can beat OSU expect a massive buzz to engulf campus. Steamrolling through the MAC will be a gargantuan task, but if NIU can enter November undefeated, expect the ESPN hype machine to be in full “boo-yah” mode. Florida in January would sure be nice.

Odds: 15 to 1

‘Bear down for history’ – Dec. 29, 2006

Story: Bears turn to defense to cap an undefeated season.

X-Factors: No Super Bowl predictions here (the game is 2007, and my crystal ball has limits), but a stout defensive core returns. Can the offense step it up? I don’t think so.

Odds: 50 to 1

‘Cubs Win; Hell freezes over’ – Oct. 30, 2006

Story: Cubs hoist first World Series trophy since 1908 behind MVP Miguel Tejada.

X-Factors: That’s right; my crystal ball brings Tejada to answer the prayers of long suffering die-hard Cubs fans. However, inept managerial tactics from Dusty Baker, a lineup rifled with holes at both corner outfield positions, second base and a pitching staff that would be dynamite if simulated games counted, make the odds of this headline the longest shot in our field.

Odds: 1,000 to 1