This week the Motion Picture Association of America placed a full page ad in the Northern Star, providing a stern warning to all illegal downloaders on the Internet. Your time is up – lawsuits begin this week.

Apparently, Dan Glickman and the MPAA have found a new way to connect with the little guy, in this case, the college student. My reaction to this ad was similar to many I have spoken to – have I done something wrong?

Before I continue, let me describe the ad for all of you who may have missed it. On top of the page is a computer mouse with a hand near the button. Underneath the mouse, traveling all the way down the page, are countless email addresses. At the top of the page is a message in big red capitalized font – IS THIS YOU? At the bottom of the page, in the same font, a message reads – IF YOU THINK YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH ILLEGALLY TRAFFICKING IN MOVIES, THINK AGAIN. Under this message, another promises, LAWSUITS BEGIN THIS WEEK (The ad can be viewed at www.respectcopyrights.org).

Now, can you see where I’m coming from? Reading something like this makes the reader quite uncomfortable. It’s one thing to warn us about illegal activities, but to threaten our futures in a college newspaper? Seems like a little much.

However, one can still see the MPAA’s point. If you aren’t doing anything wrong, then you have nothing to worry about. Let’s call it the cry of the Patriot Act – who cares if the government reads your e-mails? Don’t send any inquiring about nuclear weapons and you’ll avoid a trip to a padded cell.

But what some forget is the threat that an advertisement like this poses to the true “little guy.” This threat is targeted on the legitimate downloader, and the independent filmmaker who encourages the downloading of his films for publicity purposes.

The Internet has enabled filmmakers to reach an audience never before imaginable. This has infuriated the big boys in Hollywood – a group for which the MPAA cares very deeply. Filmmakers no longer have to go through a big studio to find their careers. Many have used the Internet to create enormous buzz for their film, a buzz that has helped them tremendously. All-out bidding wars have occurred over buzz for indy films at festivals all over the country.

Think about it – films such as “The Blair Witch Project” were made for pennies. What its creators did was use the film’s Web site to create a feeling that the Blair Witch disappearances were real. People logged on in record numbers to read about the case, and then they flocked to see the film.

The point here is that the Internet can be a very important tool for the independent filmmaker, and ads like the MPAA’s most recent are a threat to take that tool away. It’s foolish to think that such an ad is going to cause people who illegally download movies to stop. What the ad will do is terrify anybody who has never downloaded anything – terrify them enough to stay away from even legitimate downloads that are available through sites like www.ifilm.com.

This ad is no doubt a desperate follow-up to the MPAA’s often laughed at previous ad campaign. This campaign, rooted in their Web site www.respectcopyrights.org, told us that by downloading movies, we were hurting their own “little guy” in the motion picture industry.

In one commercial, which often ran with trailers in theaters, we heard from a set painter who might lose his job because of piracy. Then there was the stunt driver who feared that he may have set himself ablaze in a zooming car for the last time – all because Internet downloaders are threatening his job.

Yes, these were foolish ads and of course they did not work. Why aren’t these fellows yapping at Hollywood for moving all of their productions to Europe and Canada? Maybe if said set painter didn’t demand a union break every 15 minutes he’d have greater job security.

The ads spawned numerous mocking Web sites, one standout can be found at www.respectbootleggers.org. In one spot on the Web site, we hear from a bootlegger who has new fears about feeding his family, especially since copyright infringement lawsuits are sure to go into effect.

These hilarious sites no doubt have angered the MPAA, with their new advertisements dropping the fluff of our set painter and stuntman and getting right down to business – obey our rules or we will ruin your life!

Now that I am under a full investigation, I bid thee farewell. But since it’s guaranteed that these lawsuits will go into effect and that my master’s degree certainly won’t pay off anytime soon – at least I’ll know that the MPAA has assured a place in Hollywood should I decide to take up a career in lighting myself afire.