Somebody call the Abercrombie Lacrosse Team! The Dave Matthews Band will play the Convocation Center later this spring!

After years of requests, the Student Association went out on a limb and snatched the Dave Matthews Band, filling the blank Illinois spot on its upcoming “Visiting Colleges No One Gives a Damn About” tour.

To help alleviate the astronomical cost of the event, the SA approved a special “Dave Matthews Band ‘Is Like The Coolest’ Bill,” which draws out more than $250,000 in student fees.

Convo Center director Andrew Carter is excited to host the $500,000 band.

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“Yo, this is Andrew. Last summer, Dave and I went water skiing. We are tight. You know that ‘Crash’ song? I really wrote that. Anyway, Dave’s doing me a personal favor,” he said.

Carter added that the Dave Matthews Band is expected to sell out the arena, marking the first sellout since the Mike and Joe concert earlier this year.

Many students eagerly are awaiting the upcoming Dave Matthews Band concert.

“I love Dave. He’s like the coolest. I have all of his CDs and bootlegs and T-shirts and posters, and I even named my hamster Dave. I also bought a full wardrobe of Abercrombie and Fitch clothing because that’s the official clothing line of Dave fans. Right? I can hardly wait to buy a DMB bumper sticker for daddy’s SUV,” said bleached-blond business major Jaime Johnson, of the Ragu Delta Qui Alpha Mu Special K sorority.

Dave Matthews, on the other hand, is skeptical about coming to DeKalb.

“DeKalb? Is that the name of a vegetable?” asked Matthews.

To accommodate the expensive concert price, tickets will cost anywhere from $250 to $1,000. They will go on sale sometime, somewhere.