"Hi! Welcome to the new Facebook." Ugh. Again. When the new Facebook made its debut last month, I had as much interest in learning about new privacy settings as listening to an entire Gilbert Gottfried comedy audiotape. Yet, with all great and addictive...

When people ask me what I do, I tell them I sell crack. I tell them this not because I deal crack, but because it is much better to be thought of as a crack dealer than a journalist. As a crack dealer, my only clients are addicts; whereas being a journalist,...