In grade school, when I’d fret about an upcoming exam, a race, a presentation, my mother always knew how to help. “Smart people worry,” she’d say.
I was blessed to be raised by parents who taught my sister and I to love ourselves and to never lose faith in our own capabilities.
“Girls,” my mother always says, “Never think you don’t belong in a room.” There will always be someone, even adults – she’d add when we were young – who don’t know what they’re doing. And often, those same people have no idea they’re not hot stuff – they’re certainly not worrying – and they might not think twice to try and minimize your worth.
Women, people who present femininely, queer individuals and really everyone subjected to a workplace infected with toxic masculinity, often struggle with imposter syndrome.
In fact, the first time imposter syndrome was identified and discussed scientifically was in 1978, when Psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes investigated its prevalence among high-achieving women as a result of sexist stereotypes.
Over centuries, society telling us we’re not built right for work we actually excel at – thank you very much – has tempered how we’re wired, whether it’s internalized misogyny, self-deprecation or some other evil side-effect of the patriarchy.
You might easily feel imposter syndrome at school, in an unlucky group project assignment or a classroom of people you don’t identify closely to. When it does, remember: Smart people worry.
But whether you’re experiencing imposter syndrome in a room of peers or simply anxious in your own mind, never allow nerves to alter your image of yourself.
Julia Ogg, a professor in the psychology department at NIU, explained many students experience anxiety surrounding success in school as a result of extreme change.
“Just thinking about the pressure of academics in college can feel more significant because, you know, they might be important for your future job, or if you want to go to graduate school, you might be feeling like they’re really important to get good grades and that kind of thing,” Ogg said. “I would say it’s multifaceted, you know, it’s kind of a time of transition for a lot of people, and there may be a lot of different things going on that can make school feel a little bit stressful at times.”
Especially if you’re a first-year student adapting to college and diving into classes with a bunch of people who’ve already figured this whole thing out – remember this year may easily be the biggest transition of your life so far.
And, again, remember: Smart people worry.
Feeling anxious, nervous about your performance is natural. It’s good to be concerned. It means you want to do well and you’re considering what factors might prevent you from doing well. The fact you’re even thinking about those factors means you are much more likely to avoid them than someone who isn’t.
Just don’t allow yourself to be overwhelmed in fear about your performances.
Ogg encourages students to avoid isolation when they’re feeling anxious, and to remember NIU’s Counseling and Consultation Services is always available.
“If you try to even take small steps toward, you know, if you’re feeling nervous about a class, like reaching out to a professor, or setting like a goal of looking to the syllabus and, you know, mapping out a study plan, those kinds of things can really help you,” Ogg said. “Or reaching out to somebody can really help so that it doesn’t get worse over time, if you kind of like, take that approach, if you try to approach things, or keep going with things – versus that avoidance, which often feels like the thing you want to do.”
Of all the family wisdom I’ve needed most as I’ve aged, “smart people worry” takes the cake.
It’s a very pretty cake – decked in pink frosting, the exact blushing color of both embarrassment and pride. And I’m a little stressed out that it might topple over because it’s stacked a little too tall or that it might sink because I added too much baking soda or that everyone will think it tastes just awful.
But that’s okay.
That response – at least in relatively healthy amounts – is normal. It means I want to do a good job. When you’re panicking about midterms coming up, when you’re stressed about how your peers will react to your new idea for the project, don’t assume it’s because your mind isn’t sparkling and golden.
That worrying is a good sign – it’s a symptom of your intelligence. You’re doing just what you’re supposed to be doing, and you’re right where you’re supposed to be.
You got this, queen. Remember: Smart people worry, and you’re brilliant.
