Generally, we are not naive people. We don’t believe in Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny. Recently, however, something happened to us that made us feel pretty naive.

We went to Founders Memorial Library thinking we could actually get some work done. Pretty dumb of us, right?

For those of you who may also be misled, let us set you straight. The library is not a place to go if you want to study or read in silence. It has become a mid-week social mecca for “students” at NIU.

Who on this campus ever wondered why the local bars are so empty during the week? All their patrons choose to socialize at the library instead. Sad, but true.

In light of the current situation, we propose that Founders Memorial Library make some changes in their operations.

First, get rid of all the books—having to wind through the maze of literature is quite hindering to the socialization process. It also proves quite confusing for the many academicians who flock there.

Secondly, dim the lights (it’s much too bright) and lift the old rule of silence (it’s almost gone anyway) and crank out some dance music to phase out all of the inane conversations that go on there.

Next, set up such things as dartboards and electronic basketball games to amuse your clientele—they’re not studying to begin with, so it really won’t matter.

Of course, you’ll want to serve refreshments and food at a nominal cost and establish a cover charge.

Our suggestion for the allocation of the collected funds? Donate all profits to the Huskie Bus Line.

Since we need to find a new place to study anyway, the people who ruined the library for us may as well as pay for our transportation.

Or, if that is not feasible, give it to the local bars so they can buy books.

Jennifer Minogue

Senior

English Education

Jeanne Gilbert

Senior

English