Some of the most iconic stories in modern media feature gay couples. “Brokeback Mountain,” the story of two cowboys who fall in love with each other but are unable to pursue a real life together due to societal pressures of the mid-20th century, is one of the most beloved films of our generation. 

However, as the LGBTQ+ community has been accepted more and more, some have capitalized by disguising highly sexualized and borderline fetish content as “representation.” LGBTQ+ couples do not exist for, and should not be represented for, the sexual entertainment of non-LGBTQ+ individuals. 

Fetishization of the LGBTQ+ community is nothing new, and naturally it is most prevalent and blatant in pornography. The well-documented phenomenon of straight men and women consuming gay and lesbian pornography is largely accepted – or, moreso, ignored. 

However, a straight man watching two women have sex (a scenario which the man will obviously never experience) or vice versa, a woman watching two men have sex, is inherently voyeuristic. While voyeurism is a relatively normal kink for a lot of people, the specific viewing of LGBTQ+ sex by straight individuals is wrong. It subconsciously sexualizes romantic relationships between gay, lesbian or otherwise queer individuals. 

Transgender people are undignified in the same way, with their community being reduced to the name of a porn category and viewed by straight men and women as another flavor for their self-gratification. Even worse-so, these videos are often labeled using offensive, derogatory terms for trans people. 

It doesn’t stop at pornography, and it’s far less obvious in other situations. Gay representation in TV and film is also sexualized. 

A huge recent example is “Heated Rivalry,” a drama about two secretly gay hockey players. The story is entertaining and has a solid representation of a gay relationship, but the attitude that viewers have about the actors and the numerous sex scenes featured in the show is yet another example of LGBTQ+ sexualization. 

In an article by Psychology Today, author Isabelle Morley even described the sexual relationship between main characters Shane and Ilya as a means for the watcher to experience sexual pleasure. 

“Within 15 minutes of the first episode, Shane and Ilya are off to the races with a steamy shower scene, and the sex only gets more explicit from there,” Morley said. “They are unrestrained with each other – exploring, learning, relishing in the pleasure. It’s a safe way for viewers to enjoy intimacy since there is no personal risk, no possibility of rejection, embarrassment or loss.”

While sex scenes in media are completely normal and sometimes a powerful tool for storytelling, what we see in “Heated Rivalry” comes off like a softcore version of the LGBTQ+ porn/straight viewer dilemma. If straight viewers are using the show as a means to feel sexually gratified, as Morley suggests, or fawning over how hot the actor’s sex scene was, it again sexualizes a community they are not a part of. 

Alternatively, stories like that of “Brokeback Mountain,” where the focus is not on “wow! Look at how hot Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger are in this sex scene!” and rather on the romance and drama that comes with their heartbreakingly impossible relationship, are much more respectful and dignified. Nothing is wrong with showing LGBTQ+ sex in the media, but when it becomes the key focus of the show in the eyes of the viewer, it in turn becomes exploitative. 

Whether it be a book, TV show, movie or straight-up porn, the sexualization of the LGBTQ+ community must stop. Taking advantage of the LGBTQ+ community to sell sex is wrong. LGBTQ+ is not a porn category; it is a group of people. They should be treated and represented with dignity and respect.