Apparently, George Bush thinks he’s Superman.

Our fearless president will be heading off to Cartagena, Columbia on Feb. 15 for a one-day international drug summit. Columbia is the nerve center of the world drug trade, and for this reason, there are probably many shady characters down there who don’t care too much for George Bush and his drug war.

owever, not only is he walking into the mouth of the dragon, but he is also walking into it with a huge price on his head—$30 million to be exact.

That’s right. The Medillion drug cartel, U.S. intelligence souces say, has offered $30 million for Bush’s head, and have shipped in shoulder-fired SA-7 missiles capable of taking down Air Force One.

Many of Bush’s top aides have tried to convince him not to go, but he stands firm. He says “Listen, nobody has to go but me. I’m the only one that’s invited.”

Well, while George is hung up on being a macho man, he’s forgetting one thing. He’s got a whole country he’s responsible for. He isn’t just going alone, as he thinks he is. There are quite a few people back in America who depend on him. Send someone else, George.

If you’re still not convinced Bush should stay home, listen to two of the scariest words ever printed in a newspaper.

President Quayle.