I’m no expert on drafting football players, and I’m definitely not NFL scout material, but like every other Sunday-afternoon couch coach, I do have a few opinions about Sunday and Monday’s NFL draft.

As is the case with most drafts, this one had its winners and its losers—its expected picks and its surprises. Here’s a few draft-day happenings that fit under those categories:

Winners: The Bears. Being a known Bear basher, I hate to admit it, but the Monsters of the Midway made themselves a little more scary to the rest of the league. Their first two picks, Donnell Woolford and Trace Armstrong, were highly regarded. But Chicago’s third pick, linebacker John Roper, and sixth pick, defensive back Markus Paul, might be the class of this class.

Losers: The New York Jets. Their fourth choice, Ron Stallworth of Auburn, is probably a better player than each of their first three selections—Jeff Lageman, Dennis Byrd and Joe Mott. The bigger losers might have been the Jet fans who gave the Cleveland Browns a sarcastic standing ovation for picking Eric Metcalf in the first round instead of Andre Rison. But the New York organization brought its fans back to reality when it too passed up Rison in favor of Lageman (pronounced LOGG-a-man or THIRD-rounder).

Expected: The first seven picks went exactly as planned. However, Chris Berman of ESPN shocked nearly everyone in the TV audience when he announced Tampa Bay was going to pass up Nebraska’s Broderick Thomas and opt for former San Diego Padre first baseman Broderick Perkins. The Buccaneers quashed the rumor and took Thomas as the sixth pick of the draft.

Surprise: ESPN replaced “expert analyst” Pete Axthelm with one of those ceramic dolls with a spring-loaded wiggling head—and nobody noticed.

Winners: Green Bay Packers. As expected, the Pack picked Tony MANdaRICH with their first choice. However, they dramatically improved their team by picking Oregon’s Matt Brock in the third round. Brock was considered a solid second rounder and was a steal for Green Bay. If the Packers can find a way to get Miami QB Steve Walsh in the supplemental draft, those tailgate parties won’t be the only reason to go to Lambeau Field on a Sunday.

Losers: San Diego Chargers. Defensive lineman Burt Grossman is no answer to their quarterback woes.

Expected: Dallas signed Troy Aikman and new coach Jimmy Johnson proclaimed the UCLA quarterback the best signal-caller available. Johnson did this despite knowing that Steve Walsh, who Johnson coached for three years at Miami, was actually the top QB prospect in the nation.

Surprise: The Phoenix Cardinals used the 17th pick of the first round to take Boston College’s Joe Wolf. Many people, myself included, were surprised to find out that the former North Carolina basketball star had dropped out of the NBA and entered the NFL draft.

Winners: Chargers. I know I already listed them as losers but they desrve credit for not being duped into trading for Jim McMahon and his contract.

Losers: Los Angeles Raiders. Finished with only one draft pick in the first five rounds—guard Steve Wisniewski. Wisniewski might be good, but he hardly compares to the eight players the Bears picked on the first day.

Expected: Deion “Don’t ask me where I got these gold chains” Sanders had a clever, but obviously prepared line for his ESPN interview. When asked what would have happened if Detroit had drafted him, the Atlanta Falcon’s first-round pick said, “I would have asked for so much money they would have had to put me on layaway.”

Surprise: The Miami Dolphins chose running back Sammie Smith instead of safety Louis Oliver and were then lambasted by three Dolphin fans who were interviewed by Beano Cook. The Dolphins eventually picked up Oliver in the first round anyway. The real surprise here is that two of the three Miami fans had bigger beer bellies than Beano.