We would like to call your attention to something very evil but something which has apparently gone unnoticed for years. We feel it is our duty to inform the public of this atrocity.

The university has awarded the satanic symbol “666” to the Communicative Disorders-Speech-Language Pathology/Audiology major. Pathology, according to Webster, is defined as “something abnormal; a deviation from propriety or from an assumed normal state of non-living or non-material.” (How convenient for Satan!) Communicative Disorders are often associated with persons possessed by the devil. (Are you convinced, as we are?)

We are outraged by this. Does this mean the university has satanic tendencies? Is this a product of the devil? Has Lucifer infiltrated this administration? Are we being treated to subliminal satanic messages sponsored by this university?

Let’s face it, are we signing away our souls when we fill out our initial application to the university or even the major request forms if we want this as our major? (What if we want it as a minor?)

We call for the immediate resignation of President John LaTourette and his administration. Also, an immediate change of the major number symbol of “666.” Leave the people of this university out of this evil devil worship, and let’s go back to the normal All-American lifestyles we seek. Think about it!

Where are Jim and Tammy when you need them?!

Susan Koceki

James Zirzo

other majors