So my editor gave the “Perspective” columnists a couple of column ideas that would be appropriate for the beginning of the school year. One of them was an advice column for freshmen and I thought, “Ah hells yeah, I’m going to let these stupid freshmen know what’s up.” You know, use the senior superiority complex and act like I’ve got it all together. The truth is, however, I don’t.

I could tell you all to actually go to class because you’ll regret not going when you’re a senior and looking for jobs with a low GPA threshold.

I could tell you to get involved and be active so that you build your resume while making friends.

I could even try to tell you not to party too much because you’ll make poor decisions.

In this thing called reality, though, the majority of you are going to do the complete opposite in your new world of freedom and independence. Plus, you’ve probably heard all the previously-mentioned advice so much before that you’re numb to it.

So after three years of the college experience, what advice can I offer you? Well, in terms of succeeding, you will have to wait three years, if not 20, before you really understand what success is to you and how to achieve it.

Sorry, there is no perfect solution and there never will be. But I have one simple piece of advice that could help build your character as a human being: stop trying to be so damn cool.

“Stop trying to be cool?” You ask. “I don’t care what people think.” Yeah right, that little voice in your head that told you to say that so you would sound cool is exactly what I’m talking about. It’s this line of thinking where people try to get attention without anyone noticing or acknowledging it; pretty contradictory, huh?

Be honest with yourself and everyone around you. When you keep those self-conscious thoughts to yourself and let them build up, you can become narcissistic, which is a bad thing for all you freshmen who haven’t taken a psychology or Greek mythology class yet.

For example, when one of you guys see a dude in the weight room who looks like he’s been sculpted by Michelangelo himself, don’t get jealous and then say to your friend, “muscle heads are so obsessed with themselves,” while you just checked him out.

Sometimes the raging masculinity in the weight room can be a bit outrageous for my comfort, but it’s OK to approach that guy and ask, “Hey I’m a freshman and I was wondering what lifts I could do to build up?”

Or girls, when you want to rebel against daddy and go counterculture by submerging yourself in the pot-smoking/psychedelic/festival-going/hemp-wearing culture (which doesn’t seem to be too counterculture anymore), don’t deny what you’re doing.

Don’t lie to yourself and pretend to be chill when you get paranoid your first time smoking heady-dro or tripping on mushrooms; that is called doing drugs.

Plus, the hipsters who condescendingly say, “Be chill, yo, just chill,” aren’t exactly chill if they’re persistently shoving that concept down your throat.

The psychology behind this “being cool dilemma” is complex, obviously. The easiest way to avoid it, though, is through being honest with yourself. There will be the ridiculous people who will make fun of you for your honesty, but don’t compromise who you really are to avoid the wrath of judgmental, insecure people, because the rational people, the honest ones, are the ones who will still be here three years later.