Dear Tyra Banks,

Congratulations on starting the 10th season of “America’s Next Top Model.”

I dance to the new theme song when I’m home alone, and I’m excited that Marvita made it this season. While she certainly would have spiced up Cycle Nine, she still looks like Grace Jones. I’m rooting for her.

I am writing with purpose, though. Last week’s premiere got me thinking about what I’d like to see this season. You know, kind of like a Christmas list. But don’t worry, you won’t have to buy me anything.

1. More catfights, please! Cycle Five’s “Who ate my granola bar?” spat between Bre and Nicole was priceless. And then Kim tried to mediate, causing Bre to break a nail or something. That, and my life is boring right now.

2. More runway fierceness. That is all.

3. More talking to inanimate objects. When Lisa drunkenly named the poolside bush “Cousin Itt” and confided in it during Cycle Five, it made me feel really good about myself. I know the show is based on toothpicks strutting their way to fame and fortune, but give us commoners something to boost our own self-esteems. The girls on the show already have enough.

4. Miss J. Alexander rocks my socks. That is all.

5. More inexplicable makeovers. Can I ask why you gave Renee a mullet in Cycle Eight? I know you said she looked older than her age, so why did you make her look like Biker Barb on her way to a Hell’s Angels meeting? Just curious.

6. More praise for Whitney, Cycle 10’s plus-sized model. In past cycles, plus-sized girls have always crumbled in the limelight. I’d like to see this girl prove that looking healthy is sexier than protruding hip bones.

7. More accents. In the case of “Top Model,” an accent usually means that whomever it belongs to is totally wacko. Cycle Eight’s Natasha tried to make love to her husband through her cell phone, and Cycle 10’s Anya sounds like a Jamaican valley girl.

8. More drama queens. Cycle Six’s Jade bowed to the judges as they eliminated her. They should have been honored to have her there, really.

9. More photo shoots. That is all.

10. As you edit this season, please include footage to justify why the winner is chosen. Saleisha was crowned at the end of Cycle Nine, and I am still befuddled.

Don’t worry, Tyra. Even if none of the things on this list are fulfilled, I’ll still think you’re fierce.