While Matt Wier’s column on abstinence before marriage is well-intentioned, its distortion of the truth is saddening. There is nothing wrong with waiting for marriage before engaging in sexual activity, but it is just a choice. It is not the right choice; it is not the wrong choice. It is just a choice.

It is true that studies show premarital sex increases divorce rates by 50 percent. But smoking has also been shown to increase divorce rates by over 50 percent. The problem with these studies (and the media outlets that quote them) is that they confuse correlations with causality. A couple who follows society’s “laws” by not having premarital sex is more likely to also follow their society’s “laws” regarding divorce. Their marriages are not happier; they are simply less likely to view divorce as an option.

It is also true that premarital sex can lead to self-esteem issues. But these problems are not caused by sex. They are caused by societal pressures. The parents, religious figures, advice columnists, etc., who are telling teens premarital sex is bad are causing these self-esteem issues. In other countries (such as in Europe) where premarital and teen sex are not as taboo, these problems do not exist.

We do need to talk to our children about the risks of sex, but preaching on a high horse only fuels the real problems.

Kyle Olson

DeKalb resident