Winter seems to be through with us – finally – here in old DeKalb. As I walk from out of my cave and bathe in the beautiful sunlight and newly adjusted daylight-saving time, I suddenly remember that with the coming of fine weather there also comes a heavy price – people determined to get in my face with their handouts and win me over to the side of the Lord as I walk through King Memorial Commons.

I understand we live in a free society. I count on that – I’ve written inflammatory pieces and published them without any fear for nearly half my life now. If I wanted to, oh I don’t know – say that only crazy, deluded weirdos would take time out of their day to shove their fundamentalist literature in my face when they could be out washing the feet of the homeless or teaching inner city children to read – then I would be well within my rights. These same people who plant themselves directly in the middle of the shortest distance between my classes and the Northern Star office are also well within their rights.

The MLK Commons, like the Northern Star, is a public forum set aside specifically for the exercise of free speech – and if they want to use the commons to repeatedly imply there is something so wrong and lacking with my code of ethics that they are doing me a favor by trying to impose their own on me, then I dare say that we have a just and open society.

Just because we have a free society, however, does not mean we cannot also have a polite society. If anybody finds this column offensive to their sensibilities, can turn the page or ditch the whole issue into the nearest recycling bin or trash receptacle – since they chose to pick up the issue in the first place, I have imposed on them in no undue way. I ask only the same thing of people who feel an urgent need to rescue me from Satan – put up a sign if you like, and make your little kiosk inviting and let people come to you. I’ll still be offended by your very existence, but I’ll have no right to complain, since I have the choice to just walk by you, avoiding your gaze and ignoring you.

I have been hard on religious proselytizers in this piece, but those who wish my aid in fighting corporations, ending animal cruelty or indeed any other issue should also pay attention. Nobody appreciates being interrupted in the middle of enjoying the fresh air and the five lousy minutes of introspection they get between classes and work. If you want to win people over to your organization or your faith or your general viewpoint in life, then lead by example – you are the privileged few who have a spare three hours to actually make a difference in the world instead of sitting in a cubicle or rotting away in class. Ask yourself why you’re standing out there getting sideways glances from people who pitch your flyers in the trash once they’re out of your sight, when you could be fighting evil.