Right about now would constitute college football’s do-or-die time.

The leaves are changing, the pumpkins are carved and teams are now figuring out if they’ve got the drive and will power to win it all.

And the best part is there are eight different teams still, theoretically, in the hunt for the MAC championship. That’s two-thirds of the league not relegated to being a spoiler.

So, which team will get to refer to itself as champ for the next year? Well I’m going to tell you.

Of course I can’t figure this out on my own. It’s far too complicated. So I’ll bring in a little help. Meet the turbo-charged Wizding 15,000A super computer with the MAC media chip, 7 million gigs of hard drive, NASA processor and solitaire. I like to call it Mr. Never Wrong.

So how are you doing Mr. Never Wrong?

Good

A machine of many words. Anyway, this machine isn’t like the BCS. There are no points for margin of victory and strength of schedule. It computes answers with one key ingredient: wins.

So let me just type in every MAC team’s record and see what happens.

(Weird computing noises)

The answer is Toledo

There you have it. According to Mr. Never Wrong, Toledo will repeat as … wait. Huh? Toledo? But they just lost to Central Michigan last weekend. That’s OK. Maybe there’s a little dust in the system. It must have meant Central Michigan. Right?

Yes, Central Michigan

Ah, that’s better. Just off a win over the defending MAC Champions, CMU is the top dog this season. Except they lost to Eastern Michigan in week four.

I meant Eastern Michigan, not Central. I mixed up the direction.

But Eastern Michigan is 2-3 and lost to NIU three weeks ago. So is it NIU now?

Yes.

Yes what?

Yes, NIU.

But Akron beat them.

Did they? Akron then.

Are you even computing anymore? Akron lost to Miami. And if you were going to say Miami will win … don’t even try it. They lost already to NIU and Central Michigan.

Um, then how about Ohio?

You’re supposed to be answering a question, not asking one. And besides ,Ohio lost to Bowling Green, who lost to Western Michigan …

Too many calculations. Stop it.

… who lost to Toledo and Ball State..

Ow, my mother board hurts.

… and we already said Toledo isn’t going to win it all. But somebody has to win. So who is it Mr. Never Wrong?

Mr. Never-Wrong? Oh.

Ladies and gentleman, due to technical difficulties I won’t be able to tell you who will win the MAC this year.

I will be able to tell that it won’t be Buffalo, and you shouldn’t expect to be hearing from Mr. Never Wrong anytime soon.