I, like most people, have a mother. In addition, I have a sister and a bunch of female friends. I also have aunts and cousins, and I have had more than my share of girlfriends. But all of these women have one thing in common: they all menstruated.

As a male born in America, I am taught to fear and dislike menstruation, but I cannot say I fell for this trap. If anything, I would say I am intrigued by this, what is perhaps the last taboo.

To cite an example of how interesting I find menstruation, I will retell a tale from a few days ago. While on my way to the Northern Star office, I walked across one of the bridges by Cole Hall. On the ground I spotted a “sanitary napkin.” At first I walked by, thinking it was a sock or underwear. But a moment later, I returned to inspect it further. It appeared to be clean and unused, but discarded in a most strange place. I squatted next to it and took a picture with my phone. I have since shown this picture to all sorts of people.

However, when describing what the picture was, I often had to come up with different words for the pad on the ground. Most of the time I simply called it a pad, but other times I would call it a “sanitary napkin,” a phrase I believe I learned from my sister many years ago. I believe there was also something about Mickey Mouse mattresses as well, but I’m not completely sure.

The phrase “sanitary napkin” began to eat at me. I couldn’t quite figure it out. It seemed redundant. According to dictionary.com the word “sanitary” means “free from elements such as filth or pathogens.” A “napkin” is a “piece of cloth or absorbent paper used at a table to protect the clothes or wipe the lips and fingers.” It seems in England “napkin” also means diaper.

I suppose one would not wish to wipe ones fingers or lips with something filled with filth or pathogens, but it is not clearly indicated as such. The British use of the word sheds the most light on the situation. The commonly accepted nomenclature of sanitary napkin just suggests women need clean diapers.

What does this really mean in the context of today’s society? I can think of two options.

One, women are already adjusted to using diapers from taking care of babies. The idea of a diaper is both familiar and comforting. After all, society would have us believe women are only capable of understanding things in regards to their procreative functions anyway.

The other option is the creators compare menstruation to pooping ones own pants. Which means, like poop, menstrual fluid is to be considered vile and repulsive.

This really makes a comment about how women are viewed, especially considering the reproductive cycle which should, at least by now, be a normal part of all our lives. To view something that is so normal as something revolting and horrifying is just plain immature. Of course, what would one expect from a bunch of men, who are once again, trying to do the world of women a favor without actually asking them if they really wanted the help?

Views expressed in this humor column do not necessarily reflect the Northern Star or its staff. Send comments or questions to [email protected].