In many ways, this column is actually a sequel to last week’s.

If we learned anything from the summer of sequels, this column will cost twice as much to produce, make half as much money, lack creativity and be derided by critics nationwide. In fact, I already think it sucks.

Rest assured this column definitely will satisfy the latter two requirements for a sequel. Other sequels that fulfilled the sequel criteria are “The Matrix Reloaded,” “2 Fast 2 Furious,” “Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd,” “Rugrats Go Wild!,” “Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle,” “Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde,” “Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines,” “Bad Boys II,” “Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life,” “Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over,” “American Wedding” and “Jeepers Creepers 2.” Ugh.

One would think Hollywood might learn from these financial/creative train wrecks, but then again, it’s Hollywood. This is the same place where Hugh Grant chooses a whore over Elizabeth Hurley, and Freddie Prinze Jr. is both constantly employed and married to one of the hottest women in the world. Go figure.

Perhaps the most egregious example of sequelitis is the planned sequel to “Gladiator.” Yes, this is the same “Gladiator” movie where the gladiator’s corpse was showered with a hail of adoring rose petals. How can Hollywood follow that up with a sequel?

Ridley Scott had a brilliant idea: Make a crappy follow-up that removes all the elements that people loved, including the star, and still call it a sequel. He destroyed the “Silence of the Lambs” legacy by making the inferior “Hannibal” without Jodie Foster. Like John Shoop, he stubbornly has decided to keep running a play that won’t work.

His plan is to remove the thrilling Colosseum scenes and replace them with the powder keg of excitement that is politics. Nothing says sex, excitement and action like politics.

“I wouldn’t touch the gladiatorial side again; we have to go to the next step,” Scott told Comingsoon.net. “There will be more politics and praetorians. The parts that are interesting.”

Politics? No! Stupid? Yes! A “Gladiator” sequel without Russell Crowe and fighting is like a hamburger without a bun or the burger.

This past weekend I saw “Matchstick Men,” a movie that just skirted brilliance. Directed by the Tyler Durden (read: risk-taking) portion of Ridley Scott’s brain, it was well-acted, creatively scripted and highly entertaining.

So of course, it made no money, and Hollywood will continue to infect us with bad sequels. People complain about the lack of good movies, but if they saw the good ones that did come out, Hollywood might just rethink “Gladiator 2: The Revenge.”

Until then, expect more and more sequels. Personally, I’m thinking about filing a lawsuit against the ignorant movie-goers who caused the green lighting of “Kangaroo Jack 2: Jack is Back.” A movie like that threatens the very existence of humanity. Stop the sequel before it kills again.