Watch out “Kangaroo Jack,” “Darkness Falls” might have you beat for the worst movie of the year.

The Tooth Fairy is a real person. Matilda Dixon lived in the town Darkness Falls some 150 years ago, handing out cookies to kids in return for teeth. When two children show up missing, the lovely Darkness Falls citizens charge Matilda with murder and light her on fire, nearly killing her. Way to go … abuse the Tooth Fairy.

In turn, Matilda kills future generations of Darkness Falls children. What? This kids, is a plot hole. Plot holes sink good movies, while movies like “Darkness Falls” are built on holes. Logic requires Matilda to seek revenge on her captives. But this is a movie, and logic doesn’t apply to movies, bad movies at least.

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After the flashback sequence, the camera flashes to Kyle (Chaney Kley). Kyle just lost his last tooth, so he puts the tooth under his pillow and falls asleep, only to wake up and peek at the Tooth Fairy. And she’s not paying him money. Oh, and Kyle only has a first name – no last name. As do Caitlin, Michael, Larry and Matt, the principle players of “Darkness Falls.”

The Tooth Fairy goes bonkers and kills Kyle’s mom. Kyle avoids death by staying in his lighted bathroom. “Staying in the light,” is the way to stay alive in Darkness Falls. Because when darkness falls no one is safe. See, this is when the writers think they are clever. They title the movie after the town, which hides a secret that, for some reason, can only be defeated by light. Now where does the Tooth Fairy hide in the daytime? In a Tooth Fairy cave, with other disgruntled holiday icons, Santa Claws and Cupissed?

This whole “Tooth Fairy murdering everyone” theme lasts for the duration of the film until Kyle busts a one-liner and ends the movie. After 45 minutes of loud, but not especially terrifying (or interesting) deaths, the Tooth Fairy kills whomever, whenever, with little or no respect for any of the film’s exposition.

“Darkness Falls” teaches us a lesson in gimmick filmmaking. All one has to do for a surefire box office hit is grab a fictional icon, give it a horror spin, then watch stupid Americans lap it up. This was the No. 1 movie in America one week ago, mind you.

What’s next? A rabid Easter Bunny?sony photo

Young Kyle is stalked by the blood-thirsty Tooth Fairy in “Darkness Falls.”