I have a confession to make. Now before anyone gets excited, I should tell you that my admission is in no way sexy or juicy. This isn’t Penthouse. But if it were…(cue sexy thought).

Back to reality. I want to tell everyone that I like teasing my brothers. I know, it’s no big deal. After all, that’s what little brothers are for.

So when I was presented with the opportunity to go home this past weekend I jumped at the chance. Oh yeah, Thanksgiving had something to do with it, too.

From the second I walked into the house to the time I left, my brothers found something to tease me about. Usually it was about my futile attempt to grow a beard, but being the clever journalist I am, I was full of witty one-liners to combat their feeble attempts at making me cry.

The point of telling you this is to let everyone know how happy I was to be able to go five days without hearing one reference to someone’s mother. Not once over the weekend was a joke met with the classic comeback “your mom.” It was great because I’m really tired of hearing people make fun of each others’ mothers. I hope everyone will feel the same way I do by the time you’re done reading this.

“Yo momma jokes,” as they’re called, are juvenile, yet they remain popular. A search on the Internet produced over 9,000 Web sites dedicated to jokes about moms.

Including a few poking fun at Osama bin Laden’s mother.

Nine thousand different Web pages is a ridiculously high number, especially considering they all had many of the same jokes. Junior Mints (the greatest candy in the world) only had 2,500 Web pages. This Internet thing needs to get its priorities straight.

To better illustrate my point, I will dissect some of the jokes I found courtesy of the good folks at ducksh—.com.

Yo momma so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot-out.

Let’s just say if it was possible for this to happen, is it really anyone’s fault if he or she gets hurt in a shoot-out? I sort of feel bad for the momma.

Yo momma so fat the animals at the zoo feed her.

Come on now. When was the last time a zoo animal was eager to give up its lunch? I don’t think it matters how fat your mom is. The elephants aren’t tossing peanuts.

Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said, “What a treasure!” and her father said, “Yes, let’s go bury it.”

OK that one was actually funny, but it’s still stupid.

See how dumb they are, and those were some of the best ones.

Since I was young I had to listen to kids make fun of other people’s mothers just for the sake of a few laughs.

In grade school kids called my mom stupid. In middle school they called her ugly and fat, and by the time I was in high school she was a slut. My mommy doesn’t possess any of those traits, and she’s actually really cool. Those kids didn’t even know my mom.

But why do people make fun of moms and not dads? To find out I called Scott. Scott was the kid who used to sit in the back of my bus in middle school and make fun of everyone’s mom.

So I asked Scott: “Scott, you seem be the expert on insults. Why do kids make fun of moms and not dads?”

And Scott replied: “Your mom is the expert on insults.” And he hung up.

Well, guess what? Scott is a community college drop-out working at a car wash. I guess that’s where momma jokes get you.

Unless everyone wants to suffer the same fate Scott did, I recommend any comments about mothers be put aside. That includes saying “your mom” when someone makes a comment you don‘t like.

If we continue to accept these jokes, dumb-ass Web sites never will go away and car washes will begin popping up everywhere.