The first thing you shouldn’t do when planning a trip overseas is check out airline safety statistics.

Oops.

To fight the fear of flying, some kindly people have taken the time to put together Web sites such as www.safestairlines.com and http://aviation-safety.net. Included on these sites are statistics on the top 50 airlines and company infractions, fines, suspensions and accidents. People can look up the airline of their choice and immediately get its win-loss record.

Then there’s www.planecrashinfo.com, where those freaks interested can read about the 20 worst airplane crashes ever, in which only two accidents had survivors.

The best part of this site, really, is the photos, showing mostly piles of rubble in a field somewhere & a comforting thought.

The single light moment on these sites is the National Transportation Safety Board’s report that 90 percent of passengers on a given plane survive accidents. Their idea is that more would survive if the safety pamphlet was updated. Right.

At this point, everyone should recall “Tommy Boy,” the best movie to refer to in all situations, when David Spade conducts the safety demo and tells the audience to chuck it since nobody will survive a crash anyway. And that was only Sandusky to Chicago.

What’s funny is that the safety board knows the public doesn’t feel the safety groove.

“Public perception of survivability may be substantially lower than the actual rate of 95.7 percent for all Part 121 accidents,” the report states.

No kidding.

Everyone’s an expert on plane safety. Friends with no background whatsoever seem to have firsthand knowledge of the plane tracking system.

“It takes five people to track a plane. The pilot could be an idiot and it wouldn’t matter,” they say. “It’s all by computer.”

Computers, apparently, are invincible.

“Plus, you’re much safer in a plane than in a car,” they add. “Especially your car & no offense.”

While it’s ironic, it may be true. In 1999, there were 6,289,000 vehicle crashes. Of those, 51 percent involved injuries of some kind and 6.6 percent resulted in fatalities, according to www.car-accidents.com, which receives its information from the Federal Highway Administration.

This compares with the national airplane data, which shows that 95.7 percent of people survived accidents from 1983 to 2000. In serious accidents, 55.6 percent survived. “Serious” means the accident had to include “serious” injury, fire, damage to aircraft or destruction of a small country or at least a field.

The long and short of the story is that there isn’t comparable data, as far as years go. So far, though, planes are looking better. Since I don’t have an invincible computer, I can’t be sure.

The good news is that American Airlines and British Airways rate OK on the safety scale, according to http://aviation-safety.net. Last year, American only experienced a single fire in a cabin, causing an emergency landing, and it was fined for flying planes with incorrect circuit breakers in 1999. The last time American saw an aircraft damaged beyond repair (recall smithereens in a field here) was in 1999. Terrific.

British Airways, as far as I can tell, just has an overall drinking problem. Last year, the British Broadcasting Channel used hidden cameras to catch crew members and pilots drinking before takeoff, according to the Aviation Safety site. There also was a mechanical malfunction that caused a steep descent into New York-JFK, probably from that last little bottle. However, the last time British Airways saw an aircraft damaged beyond repair was 1991.

Looks like a bumpy ride. Maybe the crew will share their vices on the way back.

Ironically, the information is comforting. My last experience on British Airways involved a lot of turbulence and a nice, elderly couple next to me who continually said, “It’s never been this bad before.”

I’ll take that anytime over becoming one with a field.

In the meantime, I’ll take my chances with the car on the streets of DeKalb.