How many times have you gone to a friend with a serious problem? Maybe the problem wasn’t serious, but it was something that was bothering you and you just wanted to talk about it. Have you ever had a friend come to you with a problem?

No doubt most of us have. It is equally as certain that our friends have come to us with a problem that we just didn’t know how to solve.

What do you do then?

We can advise them to the best of our ability, and listen with the loving, patient ears of a true friend.

When the friend leaves, hopefully feeling better, we can only sit back and congratulate ourselves for a job well done. We know the test of time will heal the problem in any areas where we may have failed.

But what happens when time doesn’t heal the situation? When the problem continues and you no longer know what to tell them?

Like a true friend, you keep listening, and marvel at how bravely they build a brick wall to contain their emotions, which are dangerously close to surfacing.

For all you caring friends who really want to help but just don’t know how, I propose a solution.

Before I tell you, let me say that my solution also goes out to those with a troubled heart who don’t have anyone that they truly feel comfortable talking to.

No matter how large or small the trouble may seem, if it’s really bothering you, it is worth taking the time to work out. Everyday stress alone can really be a problem if it’s not dealt with correctly.

I feel that NIU’s Counseling and Student Development Center might be the right answer. They have helpful, personable staff who really care about what’s bothering you.

Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a plug for the university, or anything. I just feel that it is an excellent option that many students overlook.

You don’t have to have major problems or feel like you’re seriously disturbed to seek counseling. They are there to listen and help no matter what’s bothering you.

The counselors are trained to see everyday things a little differently than we are. Often they can help more than your best friend in the world.

If you’re embarrassed about it, you don’t need to tell anyone. Everything you say and do there is strictly confidential. I’m not saying it’s the answer to all your problems, but it certainly couldn’t hurt, and hey, it’s free! Where else can you find good, free counseling? Most psychiatrists charge hundreds of dollars for just a few sessions.

So, get help. And friends, advise your friends to talk to someone who can help before it’s too late.

Don’t think the worst won’t happen to you or your friends. Serious emotional problems are more prominent than you might think. A simple problem can escalate without warning. When stress or pain reaches a high level, people aren’t always thinking rationally.

There finally comes a time when you realize that getting wasted in response to your problem only supresses it for a couple of hours. It never makes it go away.

Just a little party tip for those who are trying to help: when you add alcohol or drugs to a depressed or emotional person, you could be lighting a deadly fuse.